Should I Stay or Should I Go

Carlos is out securing hotel rooms for us for the next few weeks.  The shop and its bought-out neighbors are totally gutted.  I can either pace through the wreckage as I have for hours, or I can tap on my laptop as I am now.  Either way, my presence is negligible.  Either way, whether I stay or go—out to a movie, or for a walk, a newspaper, a drink, whatever:  everything everywhere is crashing all around me!

[This post is an excerpt from Diary of a Heretic, the novel. Click here to read the first episode, or here to read the previous one.]

Everything’s packed but the CD player.  Gregorian chants of Benedictine monks fill my bare, crate-stacked rooms. How long since I’ve eaten solid food?  Naked in front of the mirror, I can feel my ribs.

So okay, I admitted it weeks ago! Tyler reminds me of Colin!  Now can I get dressed?  Now will I be able to eat?  Or if not eat—thinking of him (them) my skin feels so tight—I can at least drink:  I’ll start with what’s left of Carlos’s gin.  And then, when that’s not enough, for how could it be?  I’ll head downtown to see if the bar where Colin and I used to drink, illegally underage, still exists.

(Click here to read the next episode.)

Comments

[maryam in marrakesh]

Hi K,
Just dropped by to see if all is well. Drop me a line with your news if you have a minute.

Warmest wishes,
Maryam in Marrakesh

[Rufus]

Malcolm probably doesn't know that remodeling always takes three times as long as the contractors estimate.

[Kathleen]

No, I don't think he does at that moment. Certainly, he's about to discover as much.

[Dan Leo]

I think some major personal remodeling is going on also...

[Kathleen]

That's even more nerve-wracking than waiting for supplies and trying to spackle over substandard dry wall. My guess is that it takes much longer than building renovation. But of course you're right, Dan. Malcolm better get to work.