Brian’s spending the night, keeping me under observe-reverb-er-ration.
Wearing only jeans, dreads drippin’, I catch Brian in the moonlight crossing the yard. Beside him flows Hailey in a little dress. Sublime Hailey troubles me more all the time.
[Click here to read the first episode, or here to read the previous one.]
Tis true, I’m a break-out fool for Hailey. My first sight inside the radiance was Hailey’s astonishing splendor. Then I landed on me rass and closed my eyes, desperately aware of how hard I love her. More than me own soul. Nothing I can do, though. Hailey was born for Brian. Right after she met him, she whispered in me ear, “So that’s Brian the Lion.”
Altogether, I spent six weeks with Hailey. We shared plenty of true love. But that was nothing compared to Brian’s, which grows purer all the time.
Didn’t trouble me at first. I had whole heaps of time, and believed in linking with lots of girls. Saying no words, Hailey and me agreed: she should be with Brian. And to this day, no clue for me. Like I don’t fully exist.
Before our Daddy died, I was oblivious to loneliness. But after the astounding light surrounded me, which led to the mania, et cetera, no situation’s easy. An in the overpowering luminescence, I see how Brian and Hailey’s love brings out the best and bravest in them.
An I-and-I appear nowhere. How can Hailey be born for me same as Brian? When in the light maybe I was never even fully born. Could be I’m a figment.
Hailey’s standing behind Brian, who finds me on the deck. “I need to stay overnight with you, Trevor. So I can rush you to the hospital if you get groggy or sick.”
Thing is, Brian says, he has to get a bunch of students out of jail and then go pick up a group from the hospital. “Mostly guys who drank too much. I’ll be driving around all night.”
So Hailey’s watching over me. She knows what’s normal for me. After Brian leaves, she cuts her eyes all around till they fix on mine. I look away first. But she’s reassuring me. “Don’t get bothered, Trevor. We’ll be fine. Can I heat you some soup?”
I ask if she wants a little soup too. But she and Brian already ate. She’s going to read her book in the main room.
“Take anything you want, Hailey.”
Just saying her name seems desperately intimate; my voice too low and gentle. I didn’t say honey or darling or sweetheart. But saying, “Hailey” out loud affected me as if I kissed her lips. An stroked the inside of her arms. When I’m steadier, I smile. “’Night sister.”
“If you wake up, honey, come and wake me.” She can call me honey, no big deal. “I’ll peep in sometimes to make sure you aren’t sleeping too heavily.”
“A yah.”
Near sun-up Brian returns. They both stand by my bed. Hailey touches my nose and Brian taps me chin. “Here’s your phone, Trevor. I’ll be back after I run. Another few days, and we’ll be running together.”
They leave, whispering. I wait a few beats and bound outside; the dawn’s just breaking. From her deck across from mine, Polly’s glaring red eye at me.
“Morning, Polly.”
“No trickery now!” She scuttles onto my deck and pokes my chest where she punctured it when she was hiding in that tree. The spot still itches. “I’ve stayed awake, Trevor. So I know. You and Hailey had sex all night.”
“You don’t even know what sex is, Polly.”
“I know it’s not that damn lie you told me. ‘Guava jelly or fresh jam,’ you said. Carla and Crescent laughed at me. They laughed and laughed.” She forces me against the glass wall. I could push free but it’s better to make her ease up.
“Guava jelly was a metaphor, that’s all. An no matter wha’ppun in your water color class, Polly, I would never interfere between Brian and Hailey.”
“But you love Hailey like crazy. Like real weird love. And making love’s more serious than sex.”
“Making love is more serious, Polly. Hailey and I don’t make love. All her love-making is with Brian.”
“That’s not what Carla says. She told me the whole story about you and Hailey.”
“You think Carla knows everything?” I’m dizzy and want to sit down. “Did you hear what happened to me at Carla’s? There was a riot and I got a concussion.”
“You were at Carla’s and not me! You went to Carla’s and then came home and had sex with Hailey.”
“Don’t be stupid, Polly.” I push her backwards, but lightly.
“You think I’m stupid. You have sex with all the girls but not me because you think I’m stupid.”
“That’s not why. You’re not stupid. I only said ‘don’t be like that’ because you keep saying I had sex with Hailey and you’re wrong.”
“You’re a liar, Trevor. You’re a liar and a cheater and I hate you!” She turns around, walking away.
But now she’s back, shoving me against the wall. I need to lie down. But she’s yelling, “Caw! Caw!” and waving her hands near my face. When I reach to stop one hand, she plunges my Daddy’s razor-sharp knife into the itchy spot on my chest. The pain grows deeper and deeper. Polly’s twisting a four inch knife into my heart. A four inch knife but it’s real sharp and she hits the right spot.
I try telling her, “Leave it,” meaning the knife. Leave it in me and I’ll lose less blood. But it’s no use. Blood from my heart spreads through my lungs. It’s a puddle and then a pond. I’m thinking—all this within seconds—if she just leaves the knife in, less blood will gush out. But it makes no difference. I can’t breathe. My heart’s blood is drowning me.
Dying happens fast. My head drops and I’m gone. There’s nothing.
Or no, some static revives enough awareness so that I’m vaguely here when the knife clatters on the deck. Polly pulled out the knife. I slump in half.
From an impossible distance, my corpse thuds against glass, and then wood. It falls forward and knocks over a chair. Or maybe not.
Because I’m not here anymore. Far away nerve endings signal a final commotion. Polly has run into the woods. I don’t see her. I can’t see at all. But the idea’s stubborn: The covetous beast runs off.
And so there is nothing. But darkness.
The End
